The Remix

Shout out to Bert! I found out hes creeping the blog!! u sneaky man!

I made it so that if you click on Berts pic it will link you to the real life Bert's real name and his contact etc if you ever need his service or want to know who he is!!

haha jk Bert!! I know you clicked the photo!!!! if you didn't click on it let me know and I will give you 5 bucks from my wallet because I believe in the honor system and my test failed. If you did click on it you have to whisper my name ever soo silent into ur girls ear when making out. Loud enough so she can kind've hear it, but not enough to still question ur ghayness.

Getting my last laughs in at work. I wish I documented all the crap that comes out of my mouth throughout the years. Not trying to boast or anything but its pretty funny at times. Not gonna take all the credit for being funny on my own, it does stem from my friends and it helps if everyone jokes the same way plus a little bit of wit and some truth stretching goes a long way.

We call our humor style "the remix" its like adding details to an already made fact/fiction but at the drop of a dime so you can still continue using the same laughs made from the first statement and keep the flow going. Hard to explain but do you get it??? I can't give a good example because I cant freestyle garbage to you on the spot but I will try.

Pretend we are in a group right now and making general convo blah blah blah...and somebody says

person #1"Hey guys I bought a vibrator for the bachelor party"

person #2"you just bought one because your penis is too small and you put it there instead when having sex"

person #3"why the hell would you buy a vibrator for a bachelor, you weirdo who you gonna use it on??...us??"

person #2"he's too cheap to buy a vibrator, hes gonna cheat and use his own penis on us and make buzzing noises with his mouth"

person #1" that's ghay, you would be mad if I started making buzzing noises with my mouth because you like trying to makeout with me using tongue!!"

person #3"what's ghay is the "made in china" sticker you put on the side of your dick!"

person#2"how do you know? have you seen his dick?"

person#1"yea hes seen it, its on his sisters facebook photos she tagged it"

person#3"my sister has it? thats weird but whatever I'm looking at it right now on your sisters page and shes holding it"

That is a small example of "the remix" not to sure if you get it but whatever, also the jokes aren't always that homosexual in nature. Everyone at the office is getting the hang of the dumb way I joke as I am used to the way they do. Its great to laugh, never heard of anyone complain about laughing too much except when its at the expense of others but even then I don't mind getting made fun of.

The office was quiet again today, did our thing and we are out. 4 more Tuesdays to go and I am out. I had Harveys today very bad move, first off main chick is gonna rip me a new asshole for not making my lunch, secondly I wanna drop a soft serve sooo badly but I want everyone to leave so I can do it in peace. I hate dropping dueces here at the office especially since its all girls! I don't need them to judge me!! I mean I know they do their due diligence here cause I have smelt first hand their salads with rasberry vinaigrette in the form of number 2's but thats ok they are girls. I have a complex pooing in public, I want it to come out asap, I mean I push so hard that I pop blood vessels in my eyes. When I come out they forget to make a remark about the smell but ask if Im okay, is everything ok at home? did you fail your karate test?? they ask because I have tears coming from my eyes and they are watery too. Neways im out gotta leave its 5:30pm and the urge to poo has gone away!

yeaaahhhh!!!